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If I Should Go Before You

Do you know what your partner wants, when the unthinkable happens and one of you passes away

“ If I should go before the rest of you
Break not a flower nor inscribe a stone,
Nor when I’m gone speak in a Sunday voice
But be the usual selves that I have known.
Weep if you must,
Parting is hell,
But life goes on,
So sing as well. ”

― Joyce Grenfell

This is not a place to record your plans, please do not add any personal or sensitive information to this site.  Rather, it’s intended to promote the conversation,  gather information about what you might want to store and learn from the experiences of others.  in the near future we plan to offer a place to safely store your information if that is what the majority of people tell us they want.

If I should go before you

Almost certainly in all relationships, one partner will die before the other and the other will be Widowed.

Despite this, few of us are prepared for our partner’s death, bereavement or for being a widow, even when there is an illness, it is so difficult to talk about and plan.

The effect of Covid-19 on this site


Talking about dying is one of the most emotional and sensitive conversations we can have, research shows over 50% of people are unaware of their partners wishes. Yet without having that talk, a partners death is one of the most difficult paths for widows to walk.

This Website Offers

  • A guide of what to discuss and plan
  • Help to put ideas into action
  • A safe and secure space to share your thoughts
  • A forum and space to talk and learn from each other
  • Experiences of Widows
  • This is NOT a place to Store your wishes* – We aim to offer that soon

*Please tell us if you are interested in this service

Talk on Our Forum

Register on our forum and see what other people are doing and talking about. Registration is free, Indeed the whole site is free

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Who is the site for

Everyone! Not specifically widows, but their experience can help others, we aim to encourage couples, (families and close ones) to consider, talk, understand and plan for the inevitable and to store those conversations safely


We have built up a library of information mostly generated by people who have experienced the loss of a partner

Learn More

Thank You To Our Partners

We don’t have any partners yet, but we’d love to hear from people, organisations and friends that can help run this site. If you’re interested in sponsorship, or just helping out please contact us

 You can read more about us here

About Us

Join in

Talk Now!

This site is based on our personal experiences of being widowed and those of other widows we have met. It includes the many questions we would have loved to be able to ask and couldn’t, but we need your input too. We want to hear your stories, your advice and perhaps most importantly hear what you’d want to see on this site.  You can do that by registering on our forum and joining in the discussion.